Caramel Cartel
You hide your candy well
Can we meet on the street? I need a treat to eat
I'll buy whatever you've got to sell
Can I pay you next week?
I'm good for it, man
I just needs me a fix, just a Hershey's or Twix
I'll even take some Marzipan

Caramel Cartel
You cover up your trail
The price that you pay to have the cops look away
Is on a billion dollar scale
And there's nothing that you don't own
Nothing you don't control
There is no limit to the power you've been given
But you've given up your soul

Ya better pull that taffy well if you're gonna make a sale
We're gonna be just fine my friends
We'll stick together till the end
And steal all the candy that we can

Caramel Cartel
Your surly personnel
Are a criminal gang, they're dangerous and deranged
They threw my cousin down a well
He couldn't pay the tab
for his M&M bag
And although it's mean and vicious
Now he's sleeping with the Swedish Fishes

Caramel Cartel
You all belong in jail
But your product's too sweet, your dominion complete
So I'll see you all in hell

If you're looking for some sugar, well I know a guy
There ain't a single kinda candy that he can't provide
He got the tastiest confections you could ever buy
He got pounds of Mounds, Almond Joys and Moon Pies
He's sly, he's don of the bon bons,
Duke of the om noms, he won't do ya wrong
He's a wicked Willy Wonka that ya wouldn't wanna bother
He's the Gobstopper Godfather

You got a sweet tooth? I'll tell you the truth
You put some money in my hand and I'll supply what you demand,
Cause if you want it, the'll be someone gonna sell it to ya
And if you got it you can make em wanna get it from ya
It's economics and ya better not forget it truly
In your pocket is your ticket to some sweet and chewy
That's where we come in, we wanna be your friend
By nine tonight you gonna feel like you're in Candyland

Who do you think feeds those Snickers to those greedy treat or trickers?
Who do you think gets the dough when you go to a show and you buy a pack of Rolos?
Who do you think is really in control of the whole world's stock of cinnamon rolls?
Who do you think fronts the funds for the smuggling of underground sticky buns?

The Caramel Cartel
Hell yeah man
Caramel Cartel
You best believe it baby
Caramel Cartel
It goes down sweet n' easy
Caramel Cartel

Ya better pull that taffy well if you're gonna make a sale
We're gonna be just fine my friends,
We'll stick together til the end
And steal all the candy that we can